He determines the number of the stars; he gives to all of them their names.--Psalm 147:4
It's altogether beautiful (Song of Soloman 4:7). It's God's treasured possession (Exodus 19:5), and He can no more easily forget it than a mother can forget a nursing child (Isaiah 49:15).
It's....YOU, my friend.
I think a lot of people think of the church in terms of a giant labor force. There are orphans and hungry people and wars and, well, a plethora of other problems. We, as believers, are God's Plan A solution to the world's problems--that is the truth. We're meant to be salt (Matthew 5:13) to preserve the unsaved, and light (Matthew 5:14) to show them the way. And we certainly are His body, and we work together to do these things.
But this isn't some cosmic volunteer project. It's not like you show up at the altar call and then given a name badge and hustled into some line to pick up your instructions with the masses. No one arbitrarily assigns you a task--just whatever needs getting done.
Light isn't something to be directed like a robot or a mule.
I think sometimes the church gets so focused on what we think we should be doing that we miss our own unique, individual calls. And, as a result, believers can start thinking of themselves as just numbers to God--even believers who love Him and believe He loves them, believers who desire to do His will. We get so focused on spending ourselves for Him that we don't stop to ask Him what He wants each of us spent on.
I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well. My frame was not hidden from you, when I was being made in secret, intricately woven in the depths of the earth. Your eyes saw my unformed substance; in your book were written, every one of them, the days that were formed for me, when as yet there were none of them (Psalm 139:13-15).
Whoah--"wonderful" are His works. Well...we are His works, and He planned every detail of our destiny before we were born (Ephesians 2:10)!
God doesn't slap a name badge--"Hello, my name is Christian"--on our chests when we get saved. As a matter of fact, He doesn't give you a name badge. Oh no, my friend--He's not in the business of covering up what's already there. He's in the business of transformation. He gives you a new identity, and a mission that He has chosen specifically for you from the start.
This is the God who dreamed of stars and then spoke each one of them into life. I think He has bigger dreams for you than performing a task, sitting in a pew, and then dying one day. Sure, Stephen served tables. He was chosen for that, and he performed his duty as God ordained. And then, when it was time, he answered another call which he'd also been assigned: being martyred for the kingdom. (See Acts chapter 7.)
I'm not saying you're called to be a martyr. What I am saying is, there's a very specific call that God has placed on your life. God's call is not for "special" people or "chosen" people. If we're at the wedding feast, clothed in Jesus' garments of righteousness, we are chosen. (See the parable of the wedding feast in Matthew 22.) And each of us are chosen for a specific time and purpose (Esther 4:14).
If you are striving to complete some "good work," you may be neglecting the greater vision that God has for your life. What's more, you could be robbing somebody else of the blessing they've been assigned by doing it for them!
Don't over-think this. It's not wrong to serve, and there are most certainly everyday things that need to be done in the church. But God doesn't see you as a work animal, and He didn't create you just to use you for His purposes and toss you aside. He has a vision for your life that is much, much more than you could dream.
Yes, YOU.
"But I'm just a woman." "But I'm just a teacher." "But I'm just a nursery worker....just an usher...just a servant."
We are ALL servants. But guess what? The one we serve CREATED THE UNIVERSE. And, through His one begotten son, He has adopted us all as sons and daughters. And sons and daughters don't just sit on the sidelines, waiting for everyone else to tell them what to do. They go out and take the kingdom! We don't just get snatched out of the fire--we get to go take back the ground that was lost.
Don't you dare say, "But I'm just a sinner." If you haven't gotten the memo, Jesus took care of that at the cross. Put on your wedding garment and show up for the feast!
Parents purpose much more for their children than employers (even well-meaning ones) do. He has dreams for you, and a task that only you can do. In fact, if we are, as we believe, God's Plan A solution for the world, then don't you think He would create each of us to be on mission to a particular place at a specific time? We don't just get snatched out of the fire--we get to go take back the ground that was lost.
God's calling YOU, my friend. The Holy Spirit is ready to empower you to set about that beautiful work that God has had in mind for you since before you were born. Stop hiding out behind whatever table or task you have settled for and ask Him what it really is. Own it! Chances are, you're already on the right track; it's never a bad idea to serve where service is needed. But don't use "what needs to be done" as an excuse for what you should be doing.
He made stars. And He's waiting to make you shine.
Thursday, July 17, 2014
Monday, July 14, 2014
Recognizing Jesus
The Jews answered him, "Are we not right in saying that you are a Samaritan and have a demon?" Jesus answered, "I do not have a demon, but I honor my Father, and you dishonor me. Yet I do not seek my own glory; there is One who seeks it, and he is the judge. Truly, truly, I say to you, if anyone keeps my word, he will never see death." (John 8:46-51)
Jesus' words probably seemed alien to the Jews. They were trying to identify Him, to understand Him by their worldly classifications: "Are you a Samaritan? Are you possessed? Who are you?" They had no framework to help them comprehend Jesus' assertion: "If anyone keeps my word, he will never see death." They were stuck in a worldly mindset, and they couldn't see beyond it to recognize who Jesus really was.
Jesus totally disregarded their accusation that He was a Samaritan. Then He really threw them for a loop: "Truly, truly, I say to you, before Abraham was, I am" (John 8:58). Whoah there, Jesus--mixing up verb tenses? These people had no idea what the words "I AM" meant, even though God had identified Himself with those exact words before. They were so blind to who Jesus was that they picked up stones to kill Him.
Defensive much?
There's this girl at the gym I go to. She works REALLY hard on that elliptical. You can tell she is pushing her body too much, huffing away as she studies her medical textbooks. The other day, I was on the elliptical next to her, and she was silently judging me for not working as hard as she was.
How do I know she was doing that? Because I used to be that girl.
I used to organize my life with mathematical precision. Calories in, calories out, carefully maintaining what I thought was a balance. I was a little insane, and almost fell into a diagnosable eating disorder.
How does this happen? Like any problem, it began with me believing a lie from my culture: that I (as a woman and as an American) could and should become perfect. That lie grew in my mind, until I was a slave to a ritual of thought that revolved around food and exercise, and manifested in destructive behaviors like eating too little, organizing my day around meals, and working out too hard. My mindset became a comfortable security blanket to me, my mental refuge.
All that repetitive, cyclical thought accomplished exactly what the devil intended for it to accomplish: it kept my eyes focused on me, me, me, and NOT the person of Jesus Christ. And it even began to damage my body.
But I can tell you one thing without shame: Jesus wanted me so badly that He freed me from that mindset (and many other mindsets as well). Now I can look at that girl at the gym and know in my heart that I have left that type of bondage, never to look back--and that I want to help free others, too.
You probably don't have an eating disorder. But I can pretty much guarantee you that you have absorbed some lie from your culture, internalized it, and perform it every day, probably without consciously realizing it. A mindset is a familiar pattern of thought that is lived out in behaviors, usually with counter-productive results. They infuse our spirits with lies so that we become blind to who Jesus is, and we fail to recognize Him. What's more, when people try to tell us the truth about our mindsets, we pick up stones to kill them. (I hope not literally. Although my brother did throw some pillows last week when we were telling him about a mindset he needed to pray about.)
We become defensive.
Even right now you are thinking, "I don't have a destructive mindset!"
Well, the Jews didn't think so either. "Are we also blind?" asked the Pharisees (John 9:40). They were consumed by their own worldview--a religious worldview that had been reduced from the awesome righteousness of God to the self-righteousness of human performance. And because their mindset led them to believe that God couldn't possibly be a miracle-working, dirty-footed nomad from Galilee, they didn't recognize God when He was actually talking to them face to face.
I think a lot of Christians in the world today have a religious mindset that has been birthed in them not by God or His Word, but by their culture, so much so that they can't recognize Jesus even when they are sitting in church. But even more subtle are those other supposedly innocent lies we absorb from culture or from our childhoods or our families. They obscure our view of Him by locking us into a wrong mindset, drawing our eyes to ourselves rather than to the radiance of God.
What does this look like? You wouldn't know, because one of the most sinister things about a wrong mindset is that you don't know you have it.
I've known people who have had mindsets of failure, which is directly contrary to the Word of God. They wouldn't try to do things, or would even intentionally mess themselves up, simply because they were afraid to try and fail--and they didn't even realize that these behaviors were dominating their lives.
My calorie obsession was a control mindset, which can also manifest as manipulating loved ones, trying to achieve the highest grades at school, or even obsessively shaving your eyebrows and drawing them on with an eyeliner pencil. (I've seen this first-hand.)
I've known people with mindsets of unworthiness, which appears in self-demeaning comments, needy behaviors in relationships, sometimes even dressing sloppily or refusing to wear cute clothes. There's a poverty mindset, where people scrap and save and are constantly in fear that they will run out of money. There are mindsets of competition, where you constantly think about how much skinnier the girl next to you is or you keep your car spiffier than everyone else's. That can keep you from seeing people with the love of God.
There are mindsets that come from every place in your past where something went wrong, where the world hurt you and then said, "You better start thinking like me, or this will happen to you again."
We act like we don't know that Jesus came to empower us to walk out His life on earth. We make excuses for our behavior, never facing our bondage to mindsets that keep us from seeing Jesus and the power of His truth.
Well, I tell you what, folks: Jesus came to set the captives free.
The Spirit of the Lord God is upon me, because the Lord has anointed me to bring good news to the poor; he has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim liberty to the captives, and the opening of the prison to those who are bound...(Isaiah 61:1)
Do not be conformed to this world (worldly mindsets from worldly lies), but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect (Romans 12:2).
You can't determine what is perfect with your backwards mindsets. You must be transformed by the renewal of your mind(sets). When you get in the Word of God and absorb His truth, all of your thoughts and behaviors begin to change.
You start having a kingdom mindset. Your behaviors start to look less and less like fear and more and more like Jesus, the author and perfecter of your faith.
In John chapter 9, Jesus declares "I am the light of the world," and then heals the man born blind. The Jews argued among themselves about whether He was from God or from the devil. Even the formerly blind man said, "He is a prophet." Nobody really recognized Him, because they were too distracted trying to fit Him comfortably into their own lifestyles, their own ideas, their own mindsets.
They were too afraid of freedom to be set free.
Don't let your mindsets obscure the miracles in front of you. Jesus wants so badly for you to walk out your true identity in Him. Let Him rock you right out of your prison and into His glory.
Jesus' words probably seemed alien to the Jews. They were trying to identify Him, to understand Him by their worldly classifications: "Are you a Samaritan? Are you possessed? Who are you?" They had no framework to help them comprehend Jesus' assertion: "If anyone keeps my word, he will never see death." They were stuck in a worldly mindset, and they couldn't see beyond it to recognize who Jesus really was.
Jesus totally disregarded their accusation that He was a Samaritan. Then He really threw them for a loop: "Truly, truly, I say to you, before Abraham was, I am" (John 8:58). Whoah there, Jesus--mixing up verb tenses? These people had no idea what the words "I AM" meant, even though God had identified Himself with those exact words before. They were so blind to who Jesus was that they picked up stones to kill Him.
Defensive much?
There's this girl at the gym I go to. She works REALLY hard on that elliptical. You can tell she is pushing her body too much, huffing away as she studies her medical textbooks. The other day, I was on the elliptical next to her, and she was silently judging me for not working as hard as she was.
How do I know she was doing that? Because I used to be that girl.
I used to organize my life with mathematical precision. Calories in, calories out, carefully maintaining what I thought was a balance. I was a little insane, and almost fell into a diagnosable eating disorder.
How does this happen? Like any problem, it began with me believing a lie from my culture: that I (as a woman and as an American) could and should become perfect. That lie grew in my mind, until I was a slave to a ritual of thought that revolved around food and exercise, and manifested in destructive behaviors like eating too little, organizing my day around meals, and working out too hard. My mindset became a comfortable security blanket to me, my mental refuge.
All that repetitive, cyclical thought accomplished exactly what the devil intended for it to accomplish: it kept my eyes focused on me, me, me, and NOT the person of Jesus Christ. And it even began to damage my body.
But I can tell you one thing without shame: Jesus wanted me so badly that He freed me from that mindset (and many other mindsets as well). Now I can look at that girl at the gym and know in my heart that I have left that type of bondage, never to look back--and that I want to help free others, too.
You probably don't have an eating disorder. But I can pretty much guarantee you that you have absorbed some lie from your culture, internalized it, and perform it every day, probably without consciously realizing it. A mindset is a familiar pattern of thought that is lived out in behaviors, usually with counter-productive results. They infuse our spirits with lies so that we become blind to who Jesus is, and we fail to recognize Him. What's more, when people try to tell us the truth about our mindsets, we pick up stones to kill them. (I hope not literally. Although my brother did throw some pillows last week when we were telling him about a mindset he needed to pray about.)
We become defensive.
Even right now you are thinking, "I don't have a destructive mindset!"
Well, the Jews didn't think so either. "Are we also blind?" asked the Pharisees (John 9:40). They were consumed by their own worldview--a religious worldview that had been reduced from the awesome righteousness of God to the self-righteousness of human performance. And because their mindset led them to believe that God couldn't possibly be a miracle-working, dirty-footed nomad from Galilee, they didn't recognize God when He was actually talking to them face to face.
I think a lot of Christians in the world today have a religious mindset that has been birthed in them not by God or His Word, but by their culture, so much so that they can't recognize Jesus even when they are sitting in church. But even more subtle are those other supposedly innocent lies we absorb from culture or from our childhoods or our families. They obscure our view of Him by locking us into a wrong mindset, drawing our eyes to ourselves rather than to the radiance of God.
What does this look like? You wouldn't know, because one of the most sinister things about a wrong mindset is that you don't know you have it.
I've known people who have had mindsets of failure, which is directly contrary to the Word of God. They wouldn't try to do things, or would even intentionally mess themselves up, simply because they were afraid to try and fail--and they didn't even realize that these behaviors were dominating their lives.
My calorie obsession was a control mindset, which can also manifest as manipulating loved ones, trying to achieve the highest grades at school, or even obsessively shaving your eyebrows and drawing them on with an eyeliner pencil. (I've seen this first-hand.)
I've known people with mindsets of unworthiness, which appears in self-demeaning comments, needy behaviors in relationships, sometimes even dressing sloppily or refusing to wear cute clothes. There's a poverty mindset, where people scrap and save and are constantly in fear that they will run out of money. There are mindsets of competition, where you constantly think about how much skinnier the girl next to you is or you keep your car spiffier than everyone else's. That can keep you from seeing people with the love of God.
There are mindsets that come from every place in your past where something went wrong, where the world hurt you and then said, "You better start thinking like me, or this will happen to you again."
We act like we don't know that Jesus came to empower us to walk out His life on earth. We make excuses for our behavior, never facing our bondage to mindsets that keep us from seeing Jesus and the power of His truth.
Well, I tell you what, folks: Jesus came to set the captives free.
The Spirit of the Lord God is upon me, because the Lord has anointed me to bring good news to the poor; he has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim liberty to the captives, and the opening of the prison to those who are bound...(Isaiah 61:1)
Do not be conformed to this world (worldly mindsets from worldly lies), but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect (Romans 12:2).
You can't determine what is perfect with your backwards mindsets. You must be transformed by the renewal of your mind(sets). When you get in the Word of God and absorb His truth, all of your thoughts and behaviors begin to change.
You start having a kingdom mindset. Your behaviors start to look less and less like fear and more and more like Jesus, the author and perfecter of your faith.
In John chapter 9, Jesus declares "I am the light of the world," and then heals the man born blind. The Jews argued among themselves about whether He was from God or from the devil. Even the formerly blind man said, "He is a prophet." Nobody really recognized Him, because they were too distracted trying to fit Him comfortably into their own lifestyles, their own ideas, their own mindsets.
They were too afraid of freedom to be set free.
Don't let your mindsets obscure the miracles in front of you. Jesus wants so badly for you to walk out your true identity in Him. Let Him rock you right out of your prison and into His glory.
Saturday, July 5, 2014
Mustard and the American Way
He said to them, "Because of your little faith. For truly, I say to you, if you have faith like a grain of mustard seed, you will say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there,' and it will move, and nothing will be impossible for you." (Matthew 17:20)
The mustard seed is probably the smallest thing Jesus' hearers could imagine. They didn't have microscopes yet, so He couldn't say, "The kingdom of God is like a mitochondria...." But the mustard seed works better anyway, because it represents growth.
The mustard seed, to me, is the moment when we say to Jesus, "Yes, I believe you're the Son of God, and I want to give you my life." In a world full of billions of people, that may seem a small thing; but God says it can move mountains into the sea.
A few days ago, I was writing about gardens. We work hard in the gardens of our ministry--feeding the hungry, visiting the sick, speaking kind words, walking in love--but God is the one who grows the harvest. We can't make plants grow, no matter how much fertilizer we dump on the seeds.
I think personal sanctification--the process of becoming more like Jesus--works in the same way. We meet God with a mustard seed of faith, and He starts doing miraculous work in us.
We all have mountains. Most of them grew up out of our past, ugly, jutting, rocky scars on our spirits. They look impossible to move. Most of us have accepted them as simply part of the landscapes of our hearts. They form into ranges: anxiety, resentment, offense, fear of rejection, insecurities, anger, hopelessness, depression, impatience, unkind thought patterns, and every other visible or invisible sin we harbor.
It's the "American way" to conquer the mountains. Just picture little pioneers, defenseless against the wind and snow, doggedly driving oxen and covered wagons through the Rockies on their way to Oregon, their determination evidenced on their grim faces. We are told that we must work hard, that we can do anything, that there are ways to fix us, if only we would try hard enough. A good result of that is that many of those pioneers did make it over the mountains. (Well, just don't think about the Donner party.) But there's a catch: the mountains are still there.
It's important on this Fourth of July weekend to reflect on who we are and how our culture formed us. And, for many of us, the atmosphere of self-determination/motivation/whatever has just left us feeling like failures.
Why? Because we can't move those mountains by ourselves. We strive hard, alone, to conquer anxiety, bitterness, jealousy (the list goes on and on), and to "grow" the fruits of the Spirit instead. But that just looks like some little person at the base of a mountain, striving with all his might to pick it up and cast it into the sea.
It ain't happenin', bro.
This isn't to say that you shouldn't weed the garden of your soul, pulling out distractions, sinful behaviors, and other things that try to choke the life of God out of you. But what I am saying is that, if you meet God with a little mustard seed, just a teeny bit of surrender in a particular area of your life, He will respond by sending His Spirit to do the work in you.
You just have to bring Him the seed. That's harder than it sounds, since we have often been disappointed by our own efforts to fight sin and past issues. But, "I will not leave you as orphans," said Jesus (John 14:18). "...I will give you another Helper, to be with you forever, even the Spirit of truth..." (John 14:16-17).
Even Paul said, "...work out your own salvation with fear and trembling, for it is God who works in you, both to will and to work for his good pleasure" (Philippians 2:12-13). The "work out your own salvation" part sounds like great all-American advice...and then Paul blasts it with the second half of his statement.
For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them. (Ephesians 2:10)
Come to Jesus and ask Him to baptize you with His Spirit, as He promised. Believe you receive it. That's your mustard seed faith.
There is a garden inside of you, and the Holy Spirit has to produce the fruits in you. That's why they're called "fruits of the spirit," not "fruits of hard labor." Yes, you must create an environment in your spirit conducive to growth. Yes, you must weed, consciously removing distractions and sins. And you can definitely starve out your seeds if you don't water them with the Word.
But you don't have to get all American about it.
The mustard seed is probably the smallest thing Jesus' hearers could imagine. They didn't have microscopes yet, so He couldn't say, "The kingdom of God is like a mitochondria...." But the mustard seed works better anyway, because it represents growth.
The mustard seed, to me, is the moment when we say to Jesus, "Yes, I believe you're the Son of God, and I want to give you my life." In a world full of billions of people, that may seem a small thing; but God says it can move mountains into the sea.
A few days ago, I was writing about gardens. We work hard in the gardens of our ministry--feeding the hungry, visiting the sick, speaking kind words, walking in love--but God is the one who grows the harvest. We can't make plants grow, no matter how much fertilizer we dump on the seeds.
I think personal sanctification--the process of becoming more like Jesus--works in the same way. We meet God with a mustard seed of faith, and He starts doing miraculous work in us.
We all have mountains. Most of them grew up out of our past, ugly, jutting, rocky scars on our spirits. They look impossible to move. Most of us have accepted them as simply part of the landscapes of our hearts. They form into ranges: anxiety, resentment, offense, fear of rejection, insecurities, anger, hopelessness, depression, impatience, unkind thought patterns, and every other visible or invisible sin we harbor.
It's the "American way" to conquer the mountains. Just picture little pioneers, defenseless against the wind and snow, doggedly driving oxen and covered wagons through the Rockies on their way to Oregon, their determination evidenced on their grim faces. We are told that we must work hard, that we can do anything, that there are ways to fix us, if only we would try hard enough. A good result of that is that many of those pioneers did make it over the mountains. (Well, just don't think about the Donner party.) But there's a catch: the mountains are still there.
It's important on this Fourth of July weekend to reflect on who we are and how our culture formed us. And, for many of us, the atmosphere of self-determination/motivation/whatever has just left us feeling like failures.
Why? Because we can't move those mountains by ourselves. We strive hard, alone, to conquer anxiety, bitterness, jealousy (the list goes on and on), and to "grow" the fruits of the Spirit instead. But that just looks like some little person at the base of a mountain, striving with all his might to pick it up and cast it into the sea.
It ain't happenin', bro.
This isn't to say that you shouldn't weed the garden of your soul, pulling out distractions, sinful behaviors, and other things that try to choke the life of God out of you. But what I am saying is that, if you meet God with a little mustard seed, just a teeny bit of surrender in a particular area of your life, He will respond by sending His Spirit to do the work in you.
You just have to bring Him the seed. That's harder than it sounds, since we have often been disappointed by our own efforts to fight sin and past issues. But, "I will not leave you as orphans," said Jesus (John 14:18). "...I will give you another Helper, to be with you forever, even the Spirit of truth..." (John 14:16-17).
Even Paul said, "...work out your own salvation with fear and trembling, for it is God who works in you, both to will and to work for his good pleasure" (Philippians 2:12-13). The "work out your own salvation" part sounds like great all-American advice...and then Paul blasts it with the second half of his statement.
For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them. (Ephesians 2:10)
Come to Jesus and ask Him to baptize you with His Spirit, as He promised. Believe you receive it. That's your mustard seed faith.
There is a garden inside of you, and the Holy Spirit has to produce the fruits in you. That's why they're called "fruits of the spirit," not "fruits of hard labor." Yes, you must create an environment in your spirit conducive to growth. Yes, you must weed, consciously removing distractions and sins. And you can definitely starve out your seeds if you don't water them with the Word.
But you don't have to get all American about it.
Tuesday, July 1, 2014
Dirt Under Your Nails
But I am like a green olive tree in the house of God. I trust in the steadfast love of God forever and ever. I will thank you forever, because you have done it. I will wait for your name, for it is good, in the presence of the godly. (Psalm 52:8-9)
I don't know about you, but that sounds pretty good to me. I'd like to be an olive tree in the house of God, continually feeding on the water of life.
If you've been reading my blog, you know that I spent a lot of time towards the end of the school year being upset about not seeing results for some of my students. I felt like I had worked so hard, and they had worked hard, but we just didn't see all the results we wanted to see. It was then that God started talking to me about gardens.
I know a lot of old-school Southern women who take their gardens very seriously. They have timed sprinklers, picket fences, and many pairs of dirty gardening gloves. They go out and spend all day working in their gardens, and their hard work manifests in beautiful, prize-winning flowers and the juiciest, tastiest tomatoes. (You just can't get those up North, where the soil isn't alluvial...but let me lay biases aside.)
For all their hard work, however, these experienced gardeners can never actually make a plant grow. They can plant seeds, certainly. They can fertilize and weed and water, making an environment most conducive to productivity. They can even sing to their plants. But they cannot, with a magical touch of their supposed "green thumbs," make a seed germinate, sprout, bud, and produce.
We all know who does that. He has cleft a channel for the torrents of rain and a way for the thunderbolt, to bring rain on a land where no man is, on the desert in which there is no man, to satisfy the waste and desolate land, and to make the ground sprout with grass (Job 38:25-27).
Yeah. The one and only God.
In the same way, we can plant seeds in other human beings. We can sow the word of the Good News to them. We can labor hard over them, sacrificing our sweat and tears in prayer and good works. We can pour out all the living water God gives us, more and more still, to nurture them. We can be faithful to return to them day after day, never growing weary of doing good (Galatians 6:9). But we cannot actually make them grow.
That's the beautiful irony: plants will never grow if someone doesn't plant a garden, and your hard, hard work is essential. Yet it's not essential at all, because God is really doing the work.
I think we should each view our ministry on earth this way. We should always work hard, but we should realize that (thankfully) the produce of the garden does not depend on our work. This is a paradox that is so hard to grasp, and it slips through my fingers every time I try to understand it.
Paul helps a bit:
What then is Apollos? What is Paul? Servants through whom you believed, as the Lord assigned to each. I planted, Apollos watered, but God gave the growth. So neither he who plants nor he who waters is anything, but only God who gives the growth. He who plants and he who waters are one, and each will receive his wages according to his labor. For we are God's fellow workers (1 Corinthians 3:5-9).
We are fellow workers with God and each other. In heaven, Jesus isn't going to be running around handing out "lawn of the month" or "garden show finalist" certificates. Here is one of the best things about the garden: it belongs to all of us. Not only are we sowing and watering in it, we are also growing in it ourselves. And the one that both our work and our growth glorifies is our Father.
I tend to like to take my little patch of earth and work in solitude. I don't like having other people trample their booted feet through it or offer me suggestions about what seeds to plant. I don't like to leave it under the care of another. I considered keeping my job a second year for the sole reason that I did not want to leave my kids to be tended by another gardener. I wanted to place a scarecrow and a "Warning: No Trespassing" sign in my classroom. (Not literally...I'm not that crazy.) I especially wanted this because I had not yet seen the total results for many of my students. I saw buds where I wanted to see flowers.
But if you're going to co-labor with God, you're going to have to accept that you might not be the one who gets to reap what you have sown. You have to accept co-laboring with other people.
Jesus said, "Already the one who reaps is receiving wages and gathering fruit for eternal life, so that sower and reaper may rejoice together, for here the saying holds true, 'One sows and another reaps.' I sent you to reap that for which you did not labor. Others have labored, and you have entered into their labor" (John 4:36-38).
That seems a bit unfair at first reading. You may not get to see the results of your work. Or, you may have to wait a very long time to see anything coming up out of the ground. But, as usual, God always pleasantly surprises us, even if we have to wait, with the unexpected beauty and bounty of His plan.
The glory of the harvest is bigger than each of us as individuals receiving "wages" or recognition for what we've done. We will receive these things, but that's not the main point. The object is the glorification of the Father. Our Father's goal is to bless as many of us as possible by calling us to be part of His plan.
And a harvest of righteousness is sown in peace by those who make peace (James 3:18).
We work so hard, but at the same time, we're a green olive tree, planted and nourished by the shores of His peace, because [He has] done it. I can trust that the seeds I planted in my kids will grow for years to come. I worked hard, and my hard work opened the door for the true Gardener to do what He had in mind from the start. No matter how hopeless it looked, or how barren it seemed, in my sight, He is faithful, and He will surely finish it. I was just honored to be chosen as the one to get my hands dirty.
I love being a product of His imagination. Stay tuned for more thoughts about gardens in my next post!
I don't know about you, but that sounds pretty good to me. I'd like to be an olive tree in the house of God, continually feeding on the water of life.
If you've been reading my blog, you know that I spent a lot of time towards the end of the school year being upset about not seeing results for some of my students. I felt like I had worked so hard, and they had worked hard, but we just didn't see all the results we wanted to see. It was then that God started talking to me about gardens.
I know a lot of old-school Southern women who take their gardens very seriously. They have timed sprinklers, picket fences, and many pairs of dirty gardening gloves. They go out and spend all day working in their gardens, and their hard work manifests in beautiful, prize-winning flowers and the juiciest, tastiest tomatoes. (You just can't get those up North, where the soil isn't alluvial...but let me lay biases aside.)
For all their hard work, however, these experienced gardeners can never actually make a plant grow. They can plant seeds, certainly. They can fertilize and weed and water, making an environment most conducive to productivity. They can even sing to their plants. But they cannot, with a magical touch of their supposed "green thumbs," make a seed germinate, sprout, bud, and produce.
We all know who does that. He has cleft a channel for the torrents of rain and a way for the thunderbolt, to bring rain on a land where no man is, on the desert in which there is no man, to satisfy the waste and desolate land, and to make the ground sprout with grass (Job 38:25-27).
Yeah. The one and only God.
In the same way, we can plant seeds in other human beings. We can sow the word of the Good News to them. We can labor hard over them, sacrificing our sweat and tears in prayer and good works. We can pour out all the living water God gives us, more and more still, to nurture them. We can be faithful to return to them day after day, never growing weary of doing good (Galatians 6:9). But we cannot actually make them grow.
That's the beautiful irony: plants will never grow if someone doesn't plant a garden, and your hard, hard work is essential. Yet it's not essential at all, because God is really doing the work.
I think we should each view our ministry on earth this way. We should always work hard, but we should realize that (thankfully) the produce of the garden does not depend on our work. This is a paradox that is so hard to grasp, and it slips through my fingers every time I try to understand it.
Paul helps a bit:
What then is Apollos? What is Paul? Servants through whom you believed, as the Lord assigned to each. I planted, Apollos watered, but God gave the growth. So neither he who plants nor he who waters is anything, but only God who gives the growth. He who plants and he who waters are one, and each will receive his wages according to his labor. For we are God's fellow workers (1 Corinthians 3:5-9).
We are fellow workers with God and each other. In heaven, Jesus isn't going to be running around handing out "lawn of the month" or "garden show finalist" certificates. Here is one of the best things about the garden: it belongs to all of us. Not only are we sowing and watering in it, we are also growing in it ourselves. And the one that both our work and our growth glorifies is our Father.
I tend to like to take my little patch of earth and work in solitude. I don't like having other people trample their booted feet through it or offer me suggestions about what seeds to plant. I don't like to leave it under the care of another. I considered keeping my job a second year for the sole reason that I did not want to leave my kids to be tended by another gardener. I wanted to place a scarecrow and a "Warning: No Trespassing" sign in my classroom. (Not literally...I'm not that crazy.) I especially wanted this because I had not yet seen the total results for many of my students. I saw buds where I wanted to see flowers.
But if you're going to co-labor with God, you're going to have to accept that you might not be the one who gets to reap what you have sown. You have to accept co-laboring with other people.
Jesus said, "Already the one who reaps is receiving wages and gathering fruit for eternal life, so that sower and reaper may rejoice together, for here the saying holds true, 'One sows and another reaps.' I sent you to reap that for which you did not labor. Others have labored, and you have entered into their labor" (John 4:36-38).
That seems a bit unfair at first reading. You may not get to see the results of your work. Or, you may have to wait a very long time to see anything coming up out of the ground. But, as usual, God always pleasantly surprises us, even if we have to wait, with the unexpected beauty and bounty of His plan.
The glory of the harvest is bigger than each of us as individuals receiving "wages" or recognition for what we've done. We will receive these things, but that's not the main point. The object is the glorification of the Father. Our Father's goal is to bless as many of us as possible by calling us to be part of His plan.
And a harvest of righteousness is sown in peace by those who make peace (James 3:18).
We work so hard, but at the same time, we're a green olive tree, planted and nourished by the shores of His peace, because [He has] done it. I can trust that the seeds I planted in my kids will grow for years to come. I worked hard, and my hard work opened the door for the true Gardener to do what He had in mind from the start. No matter how hopeless it looked, or how barren it seemed, in my sight, He is faithful, and He will surely finish it. I was just honored to be chosen as the one to get my hands dirty.
I love being a product of His imagination. Stay tuned for more thoughts about gardens in my next post!
Wednesday, June 25, 2014
Waiting for Grace
...and hope does not put us to shame, because God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.--Romans 5:5
One of my best friends got married this week. As I danced my heart out at the wedding (unofficial bridesmaid's duty), I looked around me at the rich collection of friends I have, and I thought with joy about how much God has blessed me over the years. He has always provided people for me, people to help me in practical and spiritual ways. He has never failed to provide for me financially or otherwise. What a glorious testimony I have of His goodness!
Enough said.
And it's not like He's going to run out.
One of my best friends got married this week. As I danced my heart out at the wedding (unofficial bridesmaid's duty), I looked around me at the rich collection of friends I have, and I thought with joy about how much God has blessed me over the years. He has always provided people for me, people to help me in practical and spiritual ways. He has never failed to provide for me financially or otherwise. What a glorious testimony I have of His goodness!
The day after the wedding, I was thinking about...surprise!...marriage. Marriage between two believing people is a precious gift from God. (I know, I sound like an old grandma...but it's the truth!) It's a gift I've always known is coming to me, and which I've always longed to receive--not because I want to be a fairy tale princess or a bridezilla, but because I want to be united with a man just as Christ is united with the church, able to more fully use my gifts for Him as I work alongside another person.
But I am not married yet. And sometimes, I tend to slip into a wrong perspective about this.
I look back and see all the growth I've made over the years and am grateful that I had the opportunity to grow as a single person. I have learned things that will make me a better wife, and I am glad that I am not married yet.
But then that leads me to think: well, I suppose I wasn't good enough to be married before now. I guess I had to grow a lot to reach this point...and what's more, I'm still not married, so I must still not be good enough.
You can believe this about any gift from God that you are waiting for, be it ministry, a family, a vision for your life: that you are not responsible enough, not righteous enough, not stable enough, to handle it, and that's why God (whom we often see as a chiding parent) hasn't given it to you yet.
That's a lie.
Granted, you shouldn't rush into marriage knowing you have a ton of issues that will make it more difficult. That's not wise. However, you don't have to reach some magical point of perfection before God sees fit to reward you with it.
That's how I've seen it: as a reward. I see it as something He doesn't want to give me, something He's withholding, like a carrot before a horse, to make me keep going. Most of the time, I don't see marriage as something that God actually wants for me. In reality, it's a promise to be fulfilled, a gift that He is delighted to give me.
That's because, like any human, I think this whole life thing is about me--my journey, my worthiness, my achievements. If I haven't gotten something I want, surely it is my fault.
Is there anything that you're seeing this way in your life? Is there any dream yet unfulfilled that you consider yourself unworthy to receive?
Because, if you had to be worthy to receive things from God, Jesus would never have come down here to die for you.
"Well, I guess they're just not worthy enough to receive my grace. Guess I'd better keep it up here."
Nope: But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness."--2 Corinthians 12:9
The very definition of grace is "unmerited favor"--God loving you and blessing you regardless of whether or not you're "good enough." You don't have to "grow" to a certain predetermined (and ambiguous) measurement in order to receive it. It just is. It's not a reward. It's a gift.
God isn't denying me the gift of marriage; He's just delaying it until His time is right. It's not about whether I'm "ready" for it; in fact, it's not about me at all, but about His plan.
Shocker: it's not about me.
Sometimes, when I go to a wedding, in spite of my excitement for the bride and groom, I tend to feel like a kid who's been told I have to repeat first grade because the first time wasn't good enough. But that's not the case. I don't think He sees us all on some path to perfection, and those of us who don't make the cut have to sit at the kids' table a bit longer. He's not hiding me away in some incubator.
Like I said, it's actually not about me.
But I am not married yet. And sometimes, I tend to slip into a wrong perspective about this.
I look back and see all the growth I've made over the years and am grateful that I had the opportunity to grow as a single person. I have learned things that will make me a better wife, and I am glad that I am not married yet.
But then that leads me to think: well, I suppose I wasn't good enough to be married before now. I guess I had to grow a lot to reach this point...and what's more, I'm still not married, so I must still not be good enough.
You can believe this about any gift from God that you are waiting for, be it ministry, a family, a vision for your life: that you are not responsible enough, not righteous enough, not stable enough, to handle it, and that's why God (whom we often see as a chiding parent) hasn't given it to you yet.
That's a lie.
Granted, you shouldn't rush into marriage knowing you have a ton of issues that will make it more difficult. That's not wise. However, you don't have to reach some magical point of perfection before God sees fit to reward you with it.
That's how I've seen it: as a reward. I see it as something He doesn't want to give me, something He's withholding, like a carrot before a horse, to make me keep going. Most of the time, I don't see marriage as something that God actually wants for me. In reality, it's a promise to be fulfilled, a gift that He is delighted to give me.
That's because, like any human, I think this whole life thing is about me--my journey, my worthiness, my achievements. If I haven't gotten something I want, surely it is my fault.
Is there anything that you're seeing this way in your life? Is there any dream yet unfulfilled that you consider yourself unworthy to receive?
Because, if you had to be worthy to receive things from God, Jesus would never have come down here to die for you.
"Well, I guess they're just not worthy enough to receive my grace. Guess I'd better keep it up here."
Nope: But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness."--2 Corinthians 12:9
The very definition of grace is "unmerited favor"--God loving you and blessing you regardless of whether or not you're "good enough." You don't have to "grow" to a certain predetermined (and ambiguous) measurement in order to receive it. It just is. It's not a reward. It's a gift.
God isn't denying me the gift of marriage; He's just delaying it until His time is right. It's not about whether I'm "ready" for it; in fact, it's not about me at all, but about His plan.
Shocker: it's not about me.
Sometimes, when I go to a wedding, in spite of my excitement for the bride and groom, I tend to feel like a kid who's been told I have to repeat first grade because the first time wasn't good enough. But that's not the case. I don't think He sees us all on some path to perfection, and those of us who don't make the cut have to sit at the kids' table a bit longer. He's not hiding me away in some incubator.
Like I said, it's actually not about me.
Yes, He does pinch and mold us, like a potter with clay. But He isn't looking at us with scrutiny. He's looking at us with love. And the dreams He's given us (marriage, ministry, relationships and works that honor Him) matter to Him--He gave them to us!
You don't have to confess every sin and "get your heart right" before you take communion (in spite of what some legalistic churches have taught you), because communion is a sign of what Jesus has already done rather than a reminder of how sinful you are and how you don't deserve it. It's not about you, but about Him. Salvation isn't about whether or not you are "good enough," but about how sufficient His goodness is.
In the same way, marriage (or any other gift from God) is not about how "good enough" or "ready enough" you are. It's bigger than that. It's about how good He is.
If it's not about me, I know who it IS about: Jesus Christ. As always.
And he is before all things, and in him all things hold together.--Colossians 1:17
Enough said.
So my identity isn't "Girl-who-doesn't-deserve-to-be-married-yet," but rather, "Daughter-of-a-king-who-rejoices-in-her." My identity is defined in relation to who God is, not who I am according to my earthly status--married, single, or otherwise.
Grace is our new identity. Sometimes we feel we are waiting to receive tangible gifts from Him, but it doesn't necessarily follow that we are unworthy to receive His gifts. He's just doing His thing. He's just blessing us beyond measure, in ways that will glorify Him beyond what we can imagine. And the best thing is, we never have to wait to receive grace. He never stops giving it. It's kind of His favorite thing.
And it's not like He's going to run out.
Thursday, June 12, 2014
Speaking of identity....
Yet a little while and the world will see me no more, but you will see me. Because I live, you also will live. (John 14:19)
The world is not going to see you. The world is not going to recognize who you are. But just as you recognize the spirit of Jesus, now that He's left the world physically, He will recognize your spirit.
Which is pretty cool.
One of my favorite names for God is El Roi: the God who sees me. It doesn't matter how the world perceives you, because the one who knitted you together in your mother's womb knows when you sit down and when you rise up, and knows every thought in your mind and every word before it passes your lips (Psalm 139). Like most humans, I have such a powerful desire to be seen, recognized, and appreciated. I love that the world's rejection actually confirms my identity in Jesus, because the world rejected him, too.
Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid. (John 14:27)
The world wants to criticize me and give me an identity of failure. Sometimes, even I want to give me an identity of failure.
It's a good thing Jesus doesn't give like the world gives. Or even like I give.
Recently, I've been trying to attach the identity of FAILURE to myself. I finished my contractual term yesterday, and I don't have another job lined up. I am moving back to Mississippi, and the stress of changing addresses and dealing with adult things makes me feel lazy, and I want to act like a baby. I feel whiny on the inside. Maybe I don't seem like a mess outwardly, but inwardly, I'm not the easiest person to get along with. (Good thing I'm the only one who has to live with me.) I am getting a little focused on my sin and failure.
But: We were buried therefore with him by baptism into death, in order that, just as Christ was raised from the dead by the glory of the Father, we too might walk in newness of life. (Romans 6:4)
Christians often get stuck on "being good," on working out our faith, on sin. But sin is dead in Christ--and what we are dealing with is so much bigger than sin. It's not a matter of sin anymore; it's a matter of walking out your new identity in Christ.
We are dead, and so are our failures.
For God has done what the law, weakened by the flesh, could not do. By sending his own Son in the likeness of sinful flesh and for sin, he condemned sin in the flesh, in order that the righteous requirement of the law might be fulfilled in us, who walk not according to the flesh but according to the Spirit. For those who live according to the flesh set their minds on the things of the flesh, but those who live according to the Spirit set their minds on the things of the Spirit. To set the mind on the flesh is death, but to set the mind on the Spirit is life and peace. (Romans 8:3-6)
I used to think, when I read that, that it was a call to set your mind on the Spirit--that we had to wage war daily against our flesh. And we do have to take every thought captive and submit our bodies to God daily. But I didn't understand that this isn't a commandment to make you feel guilty about not controlling your every thought. It's not about thoughts. It's about identity.
You, however, are not in the flesh but in the Spirit, if in fact the Spirit of God dwells in you. Anyone who does not have the Spirit of Christ does not belong to him. But if Christ is in you, although the body is dead because of sin, the Spirit is life because of righteousness. If the Spirit of him who raised Jesus from the dead dwells in you, he who raised Christ Jesus from the dead will also give life to your mortal bodies through his Spirit who dwells in you. (Romans 8:9-11)
I know I'm quoting scripture all over the place, but you need to see this truth about your identity. Paul is not saying, "Don't set your mind on the flesh." He is saying, "Don't worry that you are one of those people that sets your mind on the flesh. If you have the Spirit of God in you, you aren't."
If you are a follower of Christ, alive by His Spirit, you are already setting your mind on the Spirit. God has already given you new life.
Any time you fail and sin, it's not really a matter of sin but a misunderstanding of your identity.
You are alive by the Spirit of God. All you have to do is start acting like it. Walk out the righteousness that you already are in Christ. When you have to make a choice to sin or not, remember who you are.
You are dead, and have been raised to a new life through Jesus. Because He lives, you also live.
But now that you have come to know God, or rather to be known by God, how can you turn back again to the weak and worthless elementary principles of the world, whose slaves you want to be once more? (Galatians 4:9)
He knows you. He sees you. And He doesn't see you like the world sees you. Start seeing with His eyes.
The world is not going to see you. The world is not going to recognize who you are. But just as you recognize the spirit of Jesus, now that He's left the world physically, He will recognize your spirit.
Which is pretty cool.
One of my favorite names for God is El Roi: the God who sees me. It doesn't matter how the world perceives you, because the one who knitted you together in your mother's womb knows when you sit down and when you rise up, and knows every thought in your mind and every word before it passes your lips (Psalm 139). Like most humans, I have such a powerful desire to be seen, recognized, and appreciated. I love that the world's rejection actually confirms my identity in Jesus, because the world rejected him, too.
Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid. (John 14:27)
The world wants to criticize me and give me an identity of failure. Sometimes, even I want to give me an identity of failure.
It's a good thing Jesus doesn't give like the world gives. Or even like I give.
Recently, I've been trying to attach the identity of FAILURE to myself. I finished my contractual term yesterday, and I don't have another job lined up. I am moving back to Mississippi, and the stress of changing addresses and dealing with adult things makes me feel lazy, and I want to act like a baby. I feel whiny on the inside. Maybe I don't seem like a mess outwardly, but inwardly, I'm not the easiest person to get along with. (Good thing I'm the only one who has to live with me.) I am getting a little focused on my sin and failure.
But: We were buried therefore with him by baptism into death, in order that, just as Christ was raised from the dead by the glory of the Father, we too might walk in newness of life. (Romans 6:4)
Christians often get stuck on "being good," on working out our faith, on sin. But sin is dead in Christ--and what we are dealing with is so much bigger than sin. It's not a matter of sin anymore; it's a matter of walking out your new identity in Christ.
We are dead, and so are our failures.
For God has done what the law, weakened by the flesh, could not do. By sending his own Son in the likeness of sinful flesh and for sin, he condemned sin in the flesh, in order that the righteous requirement of the law might be fulfilled in us, who walk not according to the flesh but according to the Spirit. For those who live according to the flesh set their minds on the things of the flesh, but those who live according to the Spirit set their minds on the things of the Spirit. To set the mind on the flesh is death, but to set the mind on the Spirit is life and peace. (Romans 8:3-6)
I used to think, when I read that, that it was a call to set your mind on the Spirit--that we had to wage war daily against our flesh. And we do have to take every thought captive and submit our bodies to God daily. But I didn't understand that this isn't a commandment to make you feel guilty about not controlling your every thought. It's not about thoughts. It's about identity.
You, however, are not in the flesh but in the Spirit, if in fact the Spirit of God dwells in you. Anyone who does not have the Spirit of Christ does not belong to him. But if Christ is in you, although the body is dead because of sin, the Spirit is life because of righteousness. If the Spirit of him who raised Jesus from the dead dwells in you, he who raised Christ Jesus from the dead will also give life to your mortal bodies through his Spirit who dwells in you. (Romans 8:9-11)
I know I'm quoting scripture all over the place, but you need to see this truth about your identity. Paul is not saying, "Don't set your mind on the flesh." He is saying, "Don't worry that you are one of those people that sets your mind on the flesh. If you have the Spirit of God in you, you aren't."
If you are a follower of Christ, alive by His Spirit, you are already setting your mind on the Spirit. God has already given you new life.
Any time you fail and sin, it's not really a matter of sin but a misunderstanding of your identity.
You are alive by the Spirit of God. All you have to do is start acting like it. Walk out the righteousness that you already are in Christ. When you have to make a choice to sin or not, remember who you are.
You are dead, and have been raised to a new life through Jesus. Because He lives, you also live.
But now that you have come to know God, or rather to be known by God, how can you turn back again to the weak and worthless elementary principles of the world, whose slaves you want to be once more? (Galatians 4:9)
He knows you. He sees you. And He doesn't see you like the world sees you. Start seeing with His eyes.
Friday, June 6, 2014
Identity: The New Has Come
A lot has gone down since I last posted. Granted, I posted a month and a half ago, so it's not like things haven't had a long time to brew! (My apologies for the inconsistency.)
I have been thinking a lot over the past couple weeks about this school year as it draws to a close...mostly because, when you teach kids, the end of the year kind of slams you in the face whether you wanted it to or not.
I've been testing my kids out of the program, and my data is, by normal human standards, great. But I don't operate by normal human standards. I'm a closet perfectionist. I kind of feel like I got a B when I should've gotten an A. I feel like if I had worked a little harder, invested a little more in my relationships with my tutors and students, these kids would have learned a lot more.
Forget that many of them who didn't make progress at midyear blew it out of the water on their final assessment; forget the constant love, appreciation, and affirmation I receive from my students and tutors (who are also my students, since I teach them to teach). I have built so many relationships that were difficult to build. But I have been agreeing with the lie that saturates the mentality of the world: that I am not good enough. That I have disappointed the people I care about.
Last week, I was taking a break at work because I was exhausted. When you work with kids, the only way to escape from human company is to lock yourself in the bathroom. I am not ashamed to admit that I locked the door and stood there staring at myself in the mirror for a long time. I was trying to overcome the near-crying experiences of the week and thinking over my regrets from the entire year. I was feeling like I'd failed at every relationship, not just at work, but outside of work, too. The enemy loves to take the one thing I really care about--loving people--and tell me I'm a failure at it.
God can speak to you anytime, even when you have locked yourself in the bathroom and are examining your hair in the mirror. While I was standing there, I heard a whisper: Your identity is hidden in Me.
I was like, "Yeah!...wait...that's not the verse..."
For you have died, and your life is hidden with Christ in God. (Colossians 3:3)
The verse (from one of my favorite books of the New Testament) says it's our life that is hidden in Christ. In that moment, I realized with a new shade of light that my identity is my new life in Jesus.
From now on, therefore, we regard no one according to the flesh. Even though we once regarded Christ according to the flesh, we regard him thus no longer. Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come. (2 Corinthians 5:16-17)
Why have I been regarding myself according to the flesh? The new has come.
My identity doesn't rest in my relationships with others. It doesn't rest in what they think of me, or whether or not I have disappointed them. I can't mess up, because I have died, and in my place, a new woman has been born again--a woman who looks a lot like Jesus, because her identity is hidden with Him.
This week, I read Philippians. In chapter 3, Paul is warning his readers to be aware of people who "place confidence in" (that is, rest their whole faith identity on) rituals of the flesh, like circumcision, thinking that such things are what saves them. You might be familiar with the verses that follow:
If anyone else thinks he has confidence in the flesh, I have more: circumsized on the eighth day, of the people of Israel, of the tribe of Benjamin, a Hebrew of Hebrews; as to the law, a Pharisee; as to zeal, a persecutor of the church; as to righteousness, under the law blameless.
He is listing the things he placed faith in as the source of his identity before he knew Christ.
But whatever gain I had, I counted as loss for the sake of Christ. Indeed, I count everything as loss because of the surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord. For his sake I have suffered the loss of all things and count them as rubbish, in order that I may gain Christ and be found in him, not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but that which comes through faith in Christ, the righteousness from God that depends on faith--that I may know him and the power of his resurrection, and may share his sufferings, becoming like him in his death, that by any means possible I may attain the resurrection from the dead.
He didn't have to rely on his own righteousness, his own achievements--his "perfect" score. That man was dead, and he was attaining the resurrection from the dead: new life in Christ.
Then comes one of my favorite verses:
But one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus. Let those of us who are mature think this way, and if in anything you think otherwise, God will reveal that also to you.
I don't think it was very mature for me to lock myself in the bathroom and think back on my past regrets. It's not very mature for me to feel bad about myself, a woman whom God has named perfect and whole in His son.
I didn't really fail. But who cares if I did? My identity is not in my work. It's in something that will never pass away.
It can be hard sometimes to remember to forget what lies behind and keep going toward our call. Jesus called us all to love people, and He has placed an even more specific call on my life to love people in exactly the ways I have been doing it this year, at home, at church, and at work. This is what I have to chase after, forgetting my regrets, because they don't matter.
When someone calls you, they use your name. They are telling you who you are and what you're going to do. Don't let the devil name you. He's a pathological liar (John 8:44). If you are a believer in Christ, you are born again, and that new identity is forever preserved and protected by the one who called you out of death into life--the one who spoke you into being by the word of His power. Let Him call you by name.
I have been thinking a lot over the past couple weeks about this school year as it draws to a close...mostly because, when you teach kids, the end of the year kind of slams you in the face whether you wanted it to or not.
I've been testing my kids out of the program, and my data is, by normal human standards, great. But I don't operate by normal human standards. I'm a closet perfectionist. I kind of feel like I got a B when I should've gotten an A. I feel like if I had worked a little harder, invested a little more in my relationships with my tutors and students, these kids would have learned a lot more.
Forget that many of them who didn't make progress at midyear blew it out of the water on their final assessment; forget the constant love, appreciation, and affirmation I receive from my students and tutors (who are also my students, since I teach them to teach). I have built so many relationships that were difficult to build. But I have been agreeing with the lie that saturates the mentality of the world: that I am not good enough. That I have disappointed the people I care about.
Last week, I was taking a break at work because I was exhausted. When you work with kids, the only way to escape from human company is to lock yourself in the bathroom. I am not ashamed to admit that I locked the door and stood there staring at myself in the mirror for a long time. I was trying to overcome the near-crying experiences of the week and thinking over my regrets from the entire year. I was feeling like I'd failed at every relationship, not just at work, but outside of work, too. The enemy loves to take the one thing I really care about--loving people--and tell me I'm a failure at it.
God can speak to you anytime, even when you have locked yourself in the bathroom and are examining your hair in the mirror. While I was standing there, I heard a whisper: Your identity is hidden in Me.
I was like, "Yeah!...wait...that's not the verse..."
For you have died, and your life is hidden with Christ in God. (Colossians 3:3)
The verse (from one of my favorite books of the New Testament) says it's our life that is hidden in Christ. In that moment, I realized with a new shade of light that my identity is my new life in Jesus.
From now on, therefore, we regard no one according to the flesh. Even though we once regarded Christ according to the flesh, we regard him thus no longer. Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come. (2 Corinthians 5:16-17)
Why have I been regarding myself according to the flesh? The new has come.
My identity doesn't rest in my relationships with others. It doesn't rest in what they think of me, or whether or not I have disappointed them. I can't mess up, because I have died, and in my place, a new woman has been born again--a woman who looks a lot like Jesus, because her identity is hidden with Him.
This week, I read Philippians. In chapter 3, Paul is warning his readers to be aware of people who "place confidence in" (that is, rest their whole faith identity on) rituals of the flesh, like circumcision, thinking that such things are what saves them. You might be familiar with the verses that follow:
If anyone else thinks he has confidence in the flesh, I have more: circumsized on the eighth day, of the people of Israel, of the tribe of Benjamin, a Hebrew of Hebrews; as to the law, a Pharisee; as to zeal, a persecutor of the church; as to righteousness, under the law blameless.
He is listing the things he placed faith in as the source of his identity before he knew Christ.
But whatever gain I had, I counted as loss for the sake of Christ. Indeed, I count everything as loss because of the surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord. For his sake I have suffered the loss of all things and count them as rubbish, in order that I may gain Christ and be found in him, not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but that which comes through faith in Christ, the righteousness from God that depends on faith--that I may know him and the power of his resurrection, and may share his sufferings, becoming like him in his death, that by any means possible I may attain the resurrection from the dead.
He didn't have to rely on his own righteousness, his own achievements--his "perfect" score. That man was dead, and he was attaining the resurrection from the dead: new life in Christ.
Then comes one of my favorite verses:
But one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus. Let those of us who are mature think this way, and if in anything you think otherwise, God will reveal that also to you.
I don't think it was very mature for me to lock myself in the bathroom and think back on my past regrets. It's not very mature for me to feel bad about myself, a woman whom God has named perfect and whole in His son.
I didn't really fail. But who cares if I did? My identity is not in my work. It's in something that will never pass away.
It can be hard sometimes to remember to forget what lies behind and keep going toward our call. Jesus called us all to love people, and He has placed an even more specific call on my life to love people in exactly the ways I have been doing it this year, at home, at church, and at work. This is what I have to chase after, forgetting my regrets, because they don't matter.
When someone calls you, they use your name. They are telling you who you are and what you're going to do. Don't let the devil name you. He's a pathological liar (John 8:44). If you are a believer in Christ, you are born again, and that new identity is forever preserved and protected by the one who called you out of death into life--the one who spoke you into being by the word of His power. Let Him call you by name.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)